IDRAFOJE

There are handfuls of times a parent has to loosen the grip & let go of their children-sometimes just a little, sometimes a lot, and sometimes all the way.  Kindergarten was our first big letting go.  I remember the morning clearly.  I knew Emma would jump into her new adventure head first, as she had always done up until that morning.  We would be brave and not let an ounce of our sadness, apprehension, & what if's, blind her joy in any way.  We would be as excited as she was, and give her the freedom to step ahead.  And she did.  She, in her adorable school uniform, found her cubby, hung up her lunch box & backpack, met her table friends, and found her orange square on the rainbow rug.  She listened attentively while the teacher read them their first book as a class.  She was delighted.  We hugged her and walked away-we found new deeper ways to pray, found more trust in God's Abba care over her, and felt time moving for the first time in a way that was both happy & sad.  Things would not be the same as they had been up until that morning.  She was growing up...just a little bit.

Since that morning, there have been several other first days of school, 2 sleepover parties, and a few roller coaster rides at Knott's Berry farm.  These steps have been God's way of caring for us as parents by giving us more opportunities, but not in an overwhelming sense, to loosen the grip and trust Him more. 

It wasn't until last week, we felt the tug on a parent's heart of letting go just a little bit more.  We drove Emma up to church, for her first ever church camp experience.  We were bringing her to Camp IDRAFOJE (I'd Rather Follow Jesus), where she would spend 4 nights away from us, her siblings, and our home.  She was going to spend her days slip&sliding, having water guns wars & water rodeos, singing worship songs with her friends, and falling asleep outside.  Sure we would be praying for her, sending our love through care packages, and trying to honor her request to have no little brothers sleep in her bed while she was gone.  But I wouldn't be able to pray with her at night, sing to her her favorite song, listen to her recount the day through her eyes, or tell her to use the restroom or brush her hair & teeth before she went to sleep.  I couldn't make sure her clothes weren't strewn all over the teepee and I wouldn't be able to hug her the next day or the next. I was going to miss her deeply.

She was so excited to be finally going to camp.  With her teepee assignment & her red bandanna in tow, she put her hand print on her teepee, and was ready to go. I knew Emma would jump into this new adventure head first, as she has always done.  We would be brave and not let an ounce of our sadness, apprehension, & what if's, blind her joy in any way.  We would be as excited as she was, and give her the freedom to step ahead.  And she did.  Brian called camp, "a sort of right of passage for a kid."  It felt like it.  We hugged her and walked away-and over the next 4 days, in a much quieter house, we found new deeper ways to pray, found more trust in God's Abba care over her, and felt time moving for the 2nd time in a way that was both happy & sad.  Things would not be the same as they had been up until that afternoon.  She is growing up...just a little bit more.

"Have I not commanded you?  Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go."  Joshua 1:9